Ever get the feeling your life is somewhat running on autopilot?
That you’re not really working on what you truly want, and that you’re putting off certain necessary things because you feel a need for instant gratification?
And, in turn, do you ever think that you “really should be doing” X? That you really “ought to be doing” Y? But maybe you can’t, because you “have to do” Z?
I know where you’re at. It’s not a good place.
Why would we allow ourselves to get there? Why would we allow ourselves to be running on autopilot like that?
As far as I can see, most people tend to let their lives run on autopilot to a certain extent. Not necessarily out of fear, but because they identify with what other ordinary people do, which is… Ordinary stuff.
Those who stand out are always the confident ones. Those who have the guts, the energy, and the resourcefulness to do what they want, and what’s necessary to get to where they want.
The non-fident ones, on the other hand, tend to be full-out running on autopilot. They tend to do whatever they do, because they feel like they “should”, or “have to”.
And, since this is essentially an inhibitive way of living, they tend to overcompensate on activities of instant gratification, e.g. getting drunk every weekend or slouching in front of the TV when not at work. — Effectively creating a loop of guilt and emptiness without purpose.
Oh, I’ve been there.
Does anyone genuinely want to live like that? Of course not. But many people feel obliged to, simply because they don’t know any better.
“What do you mean by “know any better”?? What exactly do I need to know then?”
Good question. And for that, you get the answer right here:
We “should” not do anything. We “ought” not do anything. In fact, we don’t even “have” to do anything.
There is only what we want to do, and what is necessary to do.
“But then shouldn’t we do what’s necessary? Don’t we HAVE to do that?”
Well, no. It’ll probably have consequences if you don’t. But really, we’re entirely free to do whatever we want.
Confident people know this. Confident people act from a mindset of freedom and safety. Whereas non-fident people tend to act from a mindset of desperation and captivity.
“But what about paying my taxes? If I don’t pay my taxes, I’ll get punished somehow, right?”
Probably, yes. But that’s not the point.
The point is, confident people do what they want AND what’s necessary.
Not because they feel forced into doing what’s necessary, but because they’re proactive about not having bad consequences happen to them — and about doing what they want.
Non-fident people, then, tend to do what others want. Or at least what they think others want. And, hence, to be running on autopilot.
“I really ought to be doing my homework”.
“I’m 30, I should be married by now”.
“I have to get this report done on time”.
I hear bells ringing all around.
I’m not saying that one’s daily tasks and chores aren’t at all necessary. For the major part, they ARE more or less important. But they’re not necessarily essential to what we truly want to do.
This week, note your daily tasks by durance and importance. At the end of each day, and at the end of the week, add them all up.
How many hours a day do you spend on doing something you allegedly “have to”, “need to”, or “ought to”? How many hours a day do you spend on doing something you truly want to?